Q. I finally decided to end my severely dysfunctional marriage with a man that I now realize is a sociopath. He is making this extremely difficult because he is stalking my every move. I am scared he is going to hurt me. What is wrong with him?
A. There are probably several things wrong with him. Being married to a sociopath is an experience you never forget and some of the scars will be with you for the rest of your life.
When your sociopathic husband realized you were going to divorce him: the very act of rejection sends him into a loss of control. Stalking often occurs because of the following:
*inability to deal with rejection
*inability to relinquish control over their targets ( ex-wife)
*inability to lose. WINNING means catching their targets into their spider’s nets and destroying them. (It was never about love……….they cannot love.)
*they want to exact vengeance and intimidate those who no longer worship them, want them, or obey them blindly.
Stalking behavior is a common strategy that sociopaths use to intimidate their non-compliant victims and an effort to punish them and regain control. For their victims this is particularly difficult to deal with because stalking laws vary from state to state.
It may not be easy to prove it is the stalker who slashes your tires, knocks down your mailbox or sends threatening letters. It is advised to take pictures, keep letters and inform the police that these situations are occurring.
If your ex-husband has directly threatened you then it should be reported to the police. Do not play with this behavior. No one can successfully play with sociopaths.
Here are some tips to follow when dealing with a stalking sociopath:
1. Always report suspicious or threatening messages to the police. You can file for a victims protective order (VPO) if he has threatened to harm you.
2. Avoid being alone in parking lots or places where he can approach you.
3. Be aware of your surroundings.
4. Tell your family and friends what is going on, especially co-workers. He might show up at your job or be waiting for you in the parking lot.
This situation is more common that you might think. MANY women have suffered from a relationship with a sociopath who sought revenge through stalking. Do everything you can to keep yourself safe and stay as far away from him as possible.